Just To Be With You

Imagine the person you care about the most in the entire world. What would you do just to be with them? Fly halfway around the world? Sprint through traffic? Ride an elephant down I-64? Now imagine what efforts you have made to spend time with Jesus this week. Does it come close? If it does then congratulations you are a better person than I am. However, I want to change that. God has put it on the hearts of The Edge staff to fast this week. Not going to lie, but I forgot about it. Dylan and Brittni reminded me of it. Don't worry I picked up the slack! I am so excited because I know God is going to use this to get us even closer, to help us become one. Use this week to redefine your relationship with God. Have your own retreat at in your self. Refresh yourselves children of God, for He is coming to rain down on us.

Dear Lord,
I miss your voice beckoning me. I pray for your spirit on my life once more. I thank you for the time we will spend together and I thank you for  the lives will be changed because of what you are going to do through myself fand I others around me.

Another huge thing that has been affecting my life now is my dating fast. It kind of came out of nowhere. I was praying upstairs because I missed youth prayer. I felt so disconnected from everything: from youth, my friends, my parents, from God. I was so numb. I longed to feel God's presence again and I was frustrated because I couldn't figure out how to move myself out of the way. Then God finally spoke. The words were a shock: "Hannah what would you do if I asked you to never get married." I looked up and bawled my eyes out for a good twenty minutes. Finally after that I said, "God you know that is probably the hardest thing you could ever ask me to do, but if this is you I will do it." Then the dating fast came up. I guess it's His way of teaching me how to put Him before anyone else in my life. I have already messed it up, but I have it back on track and I know these next six months are going to be extremely challenging for me. I need your prayer. Pray I can stay strong and that I can use this time to become the woman God created me to be. To run after him and only him. That is my heart, but my flesh cries out and pulls me in the opposite direction. I'm at a constant battle with myself and the devil is well aware. He is trying with all of his might to bring up old hurt, to create new hurt, and to hurt others around me that matter to me. I want to bind that, so will you partner with me? 

I want just to be with you oh Lord. I long for you as you long for me. Lead me towards you, call out for me, light the path to you oh Lord because I need your guidance. Make me wise like you and help me hear your voice, because my soul longs to please you and I can't bear to feel your disappointment any longer. I desire to make you proud oh God. My heart breaks for you and please break it for others. Show me how to be like you. No more turning back.

. Anywhere provided it be forward.
– David Livingstone