Just To Be With You

Imagine the person you care about the most in the entire world. What would you do just to be with them? Fly halfway around the world? Sprint through traffic? Ride an elephant down I-64? Now imagine what efforts you have made to spend time with Jesus this week. Does it come close? If it does then congratulations you are a better person than I am. However, I want to change that. God has put it on the hearts of The Edge staff to fast this week. Not going to lie, but I forgot about it. Dylan and Brittni reminded me of it. Don't worry I picked up the slack! I am so excited because I know God is going to use this to get us even closer, to help us become one. Use this week to redefine your relationship with God. Have your own retreat at in your self. Refresh yourselves children of God, for He is coming to rain down on us.

Dear Lord,
I miss your voice beckoning me. I pray for your spirit on my life once more. I thank you for the time we will spend together and I thank you for  the lives will be changed because of what you are going to do through myself fand I others around me.

Another huge thing that has been affecting my life now is my dating fast. It kind of came out of nowhere. I was praying upstairs because I missed youth prayer. I felt so disconnected from everything: from youth, my friends, my parents, from God. I was so numb. I longed to feel God's presence again and I was frustrated because I couldn't figure out how to move myself out of the way. Then God finally spoke. The words were a shock: "Hannah what would you do if I asked you to never get married." I looked up and bawled my eyes out for a good twenty minutes. Finally after that I said, "God you know that is probably the hardest thing you could ever ask me to do, but if this is you I will do it." Then the dating fast came up. I guess it's His way of teaching me how to put Him before anyone else in my life. I have already messed it up, but I have it back on track and I know these next six months are going to be extremely challenging for me. I need your prayer. Pray I can stay strong and that I can use this time to become the woman God created me to be. To run after him and only him. That is my heart, but my flesh cries out and pulls me in the opposite direction. I'm at a constant battle with myself and the devil is well aware. He is trying with all of his might to bring up old hurt, to create new hurt, and to hurt others around me that matter to me. I want to bind that, so will you partner with me? 

I want just to be with you oh Lord. I long for you as you long for me. Lead me towards you, call out for me, light the path to you oh Lord because I need your guidance. Make me wise like you and help me hear your voice, because my soul longs to please you and I can't bear to feel your disappointment any longer. I desire to make you proud oh God. My heart breaks for you and please break it for others. Show me how to be like you. No more turning back.

. Anywhere provided it be forward.
– David Livingstone

Hey Just Wanted To Say I Believe In You

" For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11

God has known I would be His missionary ever since he dreamed me up in my mother's tummy. I have known for almost as long, but God always loves to remind me about it. He knows me so well, He can tell if self-doubt starts to sneak in or discouragement tries to take root. So He decided to remind me of how much he believes in me, even if I mess up sometimes. While I was in New Jersey two weeks ago our family friend, and the present youth pastor, approached me. He told me how my dad had talked to him about my plans for the future and he said he wanted to be apart of it. So he and his wife, Buffy, committed to be my first sponsors for when I go on the missions field. Wow. That just made me feel so unworthy and happy and a thousand other things. God is already providing for me before I even started preparation to go. I'm just awestruck that He believes in me and that he could make someone else believe in me too. 

 "Behold, I will bring it health and healing; I will heal them and reveal to them the abundance of peace and truth"

Jeremiah 33:6

Another thing God has done to show me of His faith is heal me. For a long time I have had issues with my hips. They were crooked, causing a slight scoliosis in my back, and that caused my shoulders to be offset. Not only that, but my right hip didn't function correctly when I lifted my lef impairing my range of motion. What does all this mean? It basically means dancing, especially balance and flexibility, was very hard or painful for me. This month has been the "Month of Miracles" and again two weeks ago God told me it was time to get healed. So I walked up in faith and though I didn't feel any sensations or burning or other things people describe as feeling when they are healed I knew I was. At dance I could see and feel the difference. God is so amazing. He knows what our inner most heart wants and when we line our lives up with His will He makes a way for us. 

How has God been showing you He believes in you? 

"The will of God — nothing less, nothing more, nothing else." — F. E. Marsh (also attributed to Bobby Richardson)